Hello! I've finally made it! (Though currently only for this chapter, methinks. Or I'll have my own characters breathing down my neck, demanding I write.)
the mountains[,] I hear
that already, one <- I'd go for another comma before 'already', but that could just be me. It just looks and sounds wrong with the one comma there. After all, you've moved 'already' from the end of the sentence into the middle. *babble* (I hate commas)
And that's it for nits. (I have a feeling that if you held a spelling contest between native English speakers, Australians would win hands down.)
That was... WOW. I loved the WTH factor in this? Can't recall ever reading anything quite like it, in the very, very good way. That was an incredible opening chapter.
The descriptions were gorgeous and there is so much to go back for. It's one of those openings that just beg for rereading once you know what's going on, just so you can figure out what the important/key words in the letter are. (Beyond the 'maybe'.)
'twas just absolutely gorgeous. (And I am better with comments, usually, but my brain is fried thrice over today...)
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Date: 2007-01-16 12:16 pm (UTC)the mountains[,] I hear
that already, one <- I'd go for another comma before 'already', but that could just be me. It just looks and sounds wrong with the one comma there. After all, you've moved 'already' from the end of the sentence into the middle. *babble* (I hate commas)
And that's it for nits. (I have a feeling that if you held a spelling contest between native English speakers, Australians would win hands down.)
That was... WOW. I loved the WTH factor in this? Can't recall ever reading anything quite like it, in the very, very good way. That was an incredible opening chapter.
The descriptions were gorgeous and there is so much to go back for. It's one of those openings that just beg for rereading once you know what's going on, just so you can figure out what the important/key words in the letter are. (Beyond the 'maybe'.)
'twas just absolutely gorgeous. (And I am better with comments, usually, but my brain is fried thrice over today...)